One hundred RPG books "review" in one or two sentences! (Not very serious)

Just something for shit and giggles, a few OSR-related and others are pretty random. In the order I feel like:

1. Labyrinth Lord: A solid 'core system' for retro-style roleplaying.
2. Basic Fantasy: Like the above, but free and a bit easier for players more used to recent D&D editions.
3. Lamentation of the Flame Princess: Like the above, but edgier. You're also no longer allowed to like this because politics or...something?
4. Carcosa: The only thing out of LOTFP I really got into. Interesting and evocative if a bit derivative.
5. Mazes & Minotaur: My first exposure to a retroclone. Charming in it's own way.
6. Scarlet Heroes: Good system for more high powered OSR-related play.
7. Exemplars & Eidolons: When you want Scarlet Heroes but smaller and free.
8. Stars Without Numbers: OSR...IN SPAAAACE!!!
9. Silent Legions: OSR Call of Cthulhu.
10. Spears of the Dawn: The only time I ever saw someone write an RPG about Africa that wasn't about inbred cannibal tribes or about Yakub.
11. Microlite: Short and to the point.
12. Adventurer Conqueror King: Good Conan-esque game you're also apparently not allowed to talk about because politics or something.
13. Black Hack: Unusual but not terrible OSR-like fantasy heartbreaker.
14. GLOG: Another unusual but not terrible OSR-like fantasy heartbreaker.
15. D&D 3e: Monte Cook masturbate to wizards for 300+ pages.
16. D&D 3.5e: A 'patch' to the above that fixed nothing.
17. Pathfinder: Like the above two but both better and worse in every way.
18. Ponyfinder: WHY. IS THIS. A THING?!
19. D&D 4e: I may like but it's still not D&D.
20. D&D 5e: It's okay.
21. Forgotten Realms: Fantasy Canada but with less snow.
22. Dark Sun: Desert suck. City sucks. Everything suck except the setting itself, which is cool.
23. Dragonlance: Mormons write a D&D setting.
24. Eberron: I'm ashamed I used to like this.
25. Al Quadim: Ain't getting an update any time soon, buddy.
26. Numenera: Monte Cook is still a hack.
27. The Strange: Interesting setting and game concept attached to a shitty system.
28. Gods of the Fall: Exalted for Numenera or something.
29. Pendragon: A cool game that isn't talked about enough. Then again I don't think people still give a crap about King Arthur.
30. DoubleCross: A decent, if railroad-ey Japanese tabletop RPG which I ran a full game for.
31. Kamigakari: Doublecross but with less X-Men and more Type-Moon.
32. Maid RPG: A weird Japanese tabletop RPG.
33. Nechronica: An even weirder Japanese tabletop RPG where you play a zombie loli.
34. Tenra Bansho Zero: Its really, really Japanese.
35. Dark Albion: A good book you're not going to read purely because of the name attached.
36. MYFAROG: A bad book you're not going to read purely because of the name attached. Also has the worst font ever.
37. FATAL: A punchline.
38. FATE: GURPS for storygame hipsters. Not related to FATAL.
39. Baroque Space Opera: An excellent setting book which is unfortunately for FATE. Use it with another system.
40. Call of Cthulhu: A good game and a punchline but for different reasons. Roll for sanity.
41. Godbound: What if Exalted...was good?
42. Yoon-Suin the Purple Land: Made on drugs but pretty damn cool.
43. GURPS: I suck at math so I read it for the information.
44. GURPS Fantasy/Banestorm: A good fantasy setting that need more love.
45. All Flesh Must Be Eaten: When you really, really REALLY like zombies. It's okay, I like zombies too.
46. Nobilis: Jenna Moran is really pretentious.
47. Vampire the Masquerade: This was 'edgy' in the 1990 and now it's dated and trite. Metaplot ruin everything.
48. Werewolf the Apocalypse: Toilet paper, penicillin and electricity is BAD! Only magic native american furries can save us.
49. Freak Legion: The worst fucking supplement to an already bad game. Risible and tasteless beyond words.
50. Mage the Ascension: Toilet paper, penicillin and electricity is BAD! Again.
51. Changeling the Dreaming: Science is boring, evil and BAD....yet again! Also created Otherkin.
52. Wraith the Oblivion: Being dead sucks.
53. Hunter the Reckoning: You're still fucked anyway.
54. Demon the Fallen: Monotheism suck, is evil and BAD! But also true.
55. Mummy the Resurrection: Nobody played this.
56. Kindred of the East: White Wolf cannot into Asia.
57. Kindred of the Ebony Kingdom: White Wolf cannot into Africa.
58. World of Darkness Gypsies: White Wolf would like to pretend they never wrote this...
59. World of Darkness Corebook: The New World of Darkness is an example of a reboot done right. Doesn't mean the system ain't shit, it's just less shit now.
60. Vampire the Requiem: Vampire reboot without the metaplot, stupid and with way less stupid clans.
61. Werewolf the Forsaken: A better but less (ironically) funny game than it's predecessor.
62. Mage the Awakening: Another good reboot which is also sadly less playable and evocative than it's preachy predecessor.
63. Promethean the Created: Alchemy, transhumanism existentialism and frankenstein's monster. Sadly no one ever played this game.
64. Changeling the Lost: Show me on the doll where the Fae touched you.
65. Mummy the Curse: Still has no one playing it.
66. Demon the Descent: The one in all this that's actually cool and unique.
67. Beast the Primordial: Internet drama simulator where you play a trust fun drama queen with Borderline Personality Disorder.
68. Genius the Transgression: The one fangame that should have been a mainline game.
69. Hunter the Vigil: See all those supernatural things above in the list? Go kill them.
70. Exalted: Interesting concept ruined by being written by people who hate humanity, hate heroism, hate you and hate everything. Also the rules suck.
71. Exalted 2nd Edition: Rule sucks ever more and it's even more pretentious now.
72. Exalted 3rd Edition: The setting is both improved and ruined. Rules suck even more.
73. Manual of Exalted Power Infernals: A book full of rape which is, somehow, RPG.net's favorite thing about Exalted...for some reason.
74. Graceful Wicked Masque: Jenna Moran is still so fucking pretentious.
75. Scion: White Wolf tries to do Exalted again but in the modern time.
76. Kult: If the World of Darkness was good.
77. Dark Heresy: Call of Cthulhu meet Warhammer 40 000.
78. Rogue Trader: Grimdark Star Trek.
79. Deathwatch: The book is so poorly edited you can barely play it.
80. Black Crusade: Ruin more friendship than Mario Party.
81. Only War: You're dead. And so is this game line.
82. In Nomine: Heaven and Hell are more like your sucky job than you realize.
83. In Nomine Anime: Yes. This existed.
84. Paranoia: You don't have the clearance to know about Paranoia.
85. Adeptus Evangelion: Somehow it turns out Neon Genesis Evangelion make for good RPG material. Who knew?
86. Mutants & Masterminds: It's not exactly good but that won't stop me from using it as my default system for game centered on super powered beings.
87. Mekton Zeta: Because we never got an official Gundam RPG in the west.
88. Eclipse Phase: According to the creators, certain people are banned from playing this game.
89. FASA Star Trek The Klingons: A fascinating look at Klingons before their lore was truly fleshed out in TNG and onward, giving us a unique take on the race.
90. Star Trek Adventures: Not sure about the system but at least they're handling the license well. Certainly better than CBS/Paramount right now!
91. Dungeons the Dragoning: /tg/ the rpg!
92. Feng Shui: Conceptually very cool. Haven't gotten to play/run it yet.
93. Legend of the Five Rings: Do people still play this?
94. Shadowrun: A pretty okay RPG which aged pretty badly and it shows. Also piss off cyberpunk purists to no end.
95. Talislanta: Claim to have no elves but has a dozen variety of elves.
96. Unknown Armies: Say it with me: cosmic bum fights! Also a lot of postmodern nonsense, some cool and some bad.
97. Traveller: You died at character creation, didn't you?
98. Chuubo's Marvelous Wish-Granting Engine: Jenna Moran is so pre- oh I made that joke already. Twice.
99. Any Doctor Who RPG: The only setting sold upon the idea that people will like the GMPC?
100. Any Star Wars RPG: People only play this to be Jedi and maybe retcon things they didn't like out of continuity. Namely any movie not part of the original trilogy.